Entries by lanaisaacson

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Find Your Power Within

Find your power within at IMPACT’s advanced self-defense class “We all come built in with the wiring we need to survive. It’s inside all of us – we are knowing and powerful beyond what any of us can comprehend. Wow. Find it and feel it within you… it’s there. Always has been.” – Renee, an […]

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21st Century Relationship Skills

“The problem couples are having today is history,” according to Terry Real, a couples therapy and gender expert. “If you are like the millions of men and women who feel dissatisfied, you have been trying to negotiate a 21st century relationship using 20th century skills. Your expectations of what an intimate relationship is – emotional sharing, […]

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The Top 5 Losing Relationship Strategies (in The New Rules of Marriage)

Relationship strategies that sabotage your marriage As a couples therapist, I often initially hear “We love each other, but…” “We can’t communicate. And when we fight, we never get any resolution.” “I can’t trust him/her. S/he doesn’t put me first.” (view partner more as an enemy than an ally) “We’ve grown apart, feel disconnected, or no […]

The Top 5 Winning Relationship Strategies (in The New Rules of Marriage)

Expert relationship strategies to have a healthy, happy, long-lasting marriage When couples bravely enter my office, they are hurting. They want the conflict and/or disconnection to end, and the harmony and love to return. They wish to be heard, understood, (ideally their partner to change with my recommendation that s/he do so) and many ask […]

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20 Ways to Cope with Stress

Are you struggling with anxiety or stress? Treatment for anxiety or stress may include individual therapy (ex. Mindfulness, CBT, DBT, ACT, Expressive Arts Therapy), group therapy, and/or couples or family therapy, medication, nutrition, and self-help coping skills. There is no single treatment that works for every person. Some individuals find that doing yoga every day […]

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Coping with Panic Attacks

Are you struggling with panic attacks and anxiety or stress in general? I continue to refer clients to Edmund J. Bourne, Ph.D.’s 2005 book, The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook because it has one of the best and most comprehensive chapters on preventing and treating panic attacks. Panic attacks are one of the SCARIEST experiences individuals can […]

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Empowerment at the Deepest Level – IMPACT Personal Safety of Colorado

A self-defense class that changes lives! (Click here for the YouTube Video). What is IMPACT? IMPACT Personal Safety of Colorado (https://www.impact-colorado.org) is a not-for-profit organization dedicated to restoring empowerment and choice by equipping participants with the emotional, verbal, and physical skills to move freely in the world. Classes are offered for men, women, LGBTQIA, teens, and […]

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Will and Jada Pinkett-Smith on Marriage & Recovery

Marriage Lessons Learned Over 20+ Years “I’ve learned that recovery isn’t just for those suffering from substance abuse, but that recovery is about recovering from our traumas, abuse, neglect, abandonment, lack of self-worth, disappointments, failed relationships, the loss of loved ones and so on…” – Jada Addiction Roots in the Family Being raised by her […]

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Couples in Recovery – Building a Secure Attachment Style

Do you recognize this famous couple in recovery in the photograph below? (portrayed by Winona Ryder & Barry Pepper) *The answer is below… Small, yet SIGNIFICANT hints… The male partner, born in 1895, had a carefree childhood in rural Vermont until, at the age of 11, his parents divorced, and more significantly, his father moved to British Columbia, which likely felt like […]

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Sex, Mess, Kids, Work, & Money- Resolving the Most Common Couple Issues by Going Deeper

When couples come into therapy, they’re typically in a lot of pain and confusion and trying their best to make sense of what’s gone wrong with their relationship, and what needs to change to make it better. Here are some things they say: “We need help with parenting.  We’re on totally different pages about how to […]

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How Can I Forgive You? The Courage to Forgive, the Freedom Not To

Are you experiencing a relationship wound that occurred recently or decades ago such as: feeling unaccepted, unloved, or unprotected by one of your parents, estrangement from an adult sibling, resentment toward a loved one’s addiction or mental illness for ruining a milestone event in your life, profound hurt toward your partner for betraying you, despair about […]

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Is There Sex After Having Kids?

Is There Sex After Having Kids? How to Preserve Emotional and Physical Intimacy After Having a Child Wisdom passed down about how to successfully transition from couplehood to parenthood is surprisingly sparse. We all hear with excitement and trepidation, “A baby changes everything”, but we don’t exactly know what this means until we experience it. […]

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Are You in a Codependent, Avoidant, or Securely Attached Relationship?

Codependency is one of the most confused and contested words in the couples therapy field today. There could even be a debate between couples therapists and addiction counselors on whether or not codependency (and the cartoon above!) is healthy or unhealthy. Addiction counselors would likely say that codependency originates in childhood and manifests as an […]

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Fighting Well for Both Partners to Win!

Why is fighting (hot conflict) or avoidance/emotional distance (cold conflict) scary for so many people? I think the answer can be found in the underlying fears that people rarely speak about… the fear of being abandoned the fear of being rejected the fear of being hurt if your feelings/needs are dismissed (emotional deprivation) the fear […]

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Double Pinky Promise

As you may recall, I wrote a poem called “Through the Yellow Door” about my struggle with my son’s transition to Kindergarten and my realization that the only way to let go and move forward was for me to mourn and launch, too (which are actual tips for “empty nesters” launching their young adults). I […]

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Can I Help My Family Member or Friend with an Addiction?

This is the most common question I hear as an addictions counselor (since 2001). The good news is~ YES, YOU CAN HELP YOUR LOVED ONE GET SOBER! And, if your family needs immediate assistance, call Lana Isaacson, Couples and Family Therapist and Certified Addictions Counselor at: 720.432.5262. I would like to briefly clarify the concepts of “sobriety”, […]

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The Gifts of Imperfect Parenting (based on Brene Brown’s work)

“We all know that perfect parenting does not exist, yet we still struggle with the social expectations that teach us that being imperfect is synonymous with being inadequate. These messages are powerful and weend up spending precious time and energy managing perception and the carefully edited versions of the families we show to the world”. […]

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My Story of Being an LGBTQ Ally from birth

Here’s my unique story of growing up both in Boys Town & a “typical” Chicago suburb~ I AM AN ALLY and have been an ally to the LGBTQ community from birth. I grew up with two loving uncles and their community of friends, which felt like a family. I also got to know the LGBTQ […]

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Coping with “The Blues”- Healthy Ways to Feel Uplifted!

Are you struggling with depression or “the blues”? Treatment for depression may include individual, group (ex. CBT or DBT), and/or couples or family therapy, medication, nutrition, self-help coping skills, and sometimes more intensive treatments, (ex. TMS). There is no single treatment that works for every person. Some individuals find that doing yoga every day is […]